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makemefly

Interracial Marriage


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!!

i see too many liao since young :dunno:..

when i was roman catholic, i always see chinese married indians..

now im muslim i see chinese & others married malays :)

 

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In general, I think the problem is not in the couple, but in the people around them, ie the pressure, real or perceived from the families, friends, etc. Religion can also be a barrier, esp if one or both sides are uncompromising.

 

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how about ang mo and chinese marriage? this is tougher right? curious :P

ang moh and chinese marriage is already very common liao. :unsure:

in life, maybe some people are really fated to be married to other races then if their marriages are not approved by the people around them, then how? once missed the chance then probably no more chance liao. :unsure:

 

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I had a friend who is a indian, married a chinese.. now got a baby gal. :unsure:

Got another good friend, whose BF is a french guy, this coming Aug getting married. Every xmas got to go back to French to visit the parents... meaning can go french shopping.. :unsure:

 

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i voted but just to share, i'm already married so i had to change the first question a little bit in my mind.

my answer was yes, i would have married someone outside my race if that was my fate but in the end i married someone from the same race as i.

no biggie. whichever way it is, it's not an issue for me and my family. :unsure:

 

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ang moh and chinese marriage is already very common liao. :)

in life, maybe some people are really fated to be married to other races then if their marriages are not approved by the people around them, then how? once missed the chance then probably no more chance liao. :)

Yep. My husband's cousin fell in love with a girl outside his ethnic group and religion. Parents on both sides were against the union. The girl later left for Australia with her parents, without telling him. His heart was so broken (I can only guess, since he remained single ever since). Sometimes I wonder if the parents regret their decision, cuz at the end of the day their child has no partner.

Would you defy your parents/ family's wishes to be with someone you love just because they are different?

Edited by makemefly
 

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Would you defy your parents/ family's wishes to be with someone you love just because they are different?

probably i wont defy my parents' wishes bcos parents only have two in this whole world and moreover they're the ones who brought me up. :)

 

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Yep. My husband's cousin fell in love with a girl outside his ethnic group and religion. Parents on both sides were against the union. The girl later left for Australia with her parents, without telling him. His heart was so broken (I can only guess, since he remained single ever since). Sometimes I wonder if the parents regret their decision, cuz at the end of the day their child has no partner.

Would you defy your parents/ family's wishes to be with someone you love just because they are different?

My wife friend defy her parent strong objection and married to another race and convert her religion. After their son was born she then realised her husband had an affair while they were in Australia.

They shifted to Australia cos her HB wan to study, so she start to work there while her HB bring woman back to their apartment to have fun. :notti: She only came to know when they are back to Spore and he even propose to let that woman stay in their hse. Divorse is the only choice but nightmare start when her mother-in-law start to poison her son that her mother was bad and she is the one who wan to abondon him. :dribble:

The best part is all along the school fees, living exp in Australia and even staying in Spore exp were all paid by her. :notti::rofl::lol: I am not sure this got to do with other races but at least u are more familiar with ur own race or culture.

 

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Would you defy your parents/ family's wishes to be with someone you love just because they are different?

This is very hard to determine.. Love is blind. If say now wont defy, when in such cases, things might appear differently. It is easy to say than done.

 

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Interesting post. Jus to share my experience....

I m chinese married to black, and no he is not from Africa, he is of African decent. From my sentence u would hv guess how many times i go thru this line. i had to explain that jus like we r chinese but not from china to so many pple dat i lost count many years ago... I lost some friends, those who can't accept our relationship. Surprisingly, my family is more receptive of him than my friends.... mayb they r jus happy that i decide to go into a serious relationship. My mum was only concern if he was single and got a steady job.

We met 10 years ago, when there was only a handful of blacks here. U can't even imagine the amt of comments dat we got from strangers in public, we had nearly caused accidents on the road b4. We were just crossing the road at a traffic light and pple in the cars were staring at us and their cars were rolling forward.... !! I hv been asked if all chinese men died, hv i tot about how pple will c our children, y i chose black instead of white, does he hv a real job (cos lots of pple here think black r only capable of playing basketball, football, rap or hip hop) :jammin: . We r married for 4 years now and we hv a 21 mth old boy, when daddy is not wif us, pple think i m the nanny, my boy is malay or indian, is his hair permed??!! :rofl:

All these things dat we go thru each day jus make our relationship stronger, cos rite from the start when we decide to be together, we know wat we will hv to go thru on a daily basis.... We work harder to keep our relationship going and hv lots of laughs along the way..... collecting new comments and making them our private jokes to share wif our other interracial marriage friends. Our exchange of experiences of our vastly different backgrounds enriched our personal selves. Bcos of our different backgrounds, we never presume about anything wif each other, always bear in mind about respect for each other's differences, always speak up and maintain high level of communication. All of which happen to be important key points to a healthy relationship... :sport-smiley-003:

 

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Interesting post. Jus to share my experience....

I m chinese married to black, and no he is not from Africa, he is of African decent. From my sentence u would hv guess how many times i go thru this line. i had to explain that jus like we r chinese but not from china to so many pple dat i lost count many years ago... I lost some friends, those who can't accept our relationship. Surprisingly, my family is more receptive of him than my friends.... mayb they r jus happy that i decide to go into a serious relationship. My mum was only concern if he was single and got a steady job.

We met 10 years ago, when there was only a handful of blacks here. U can't even imagine the amt of comments dat we got from strangers in public, we had nearly caused accidents on the road b4. We were just crossing the road at a traffic light and pple in the cars were staring at us and their cars were rolling forward.... !! I hv been asked if all chinese men died, hv i tot about how pple will c our children, y i chose black instead of white, does he hv a real job (cos lots of pple here think black r only capable of playing basketball, football, rap or hip hop) :jammin: . We r married for 4 years now and we hv a 21 mth old boy, when daddy is not wif us, pple think i m the nanny, my boy is malay or indian, is his hair permed??!! :rofl:

All these things dat we go thru each day jus make our relationship stronger, cos rite from the start when we decide to be together, we know wat we will hv to go thru on a daily basis.... We work harder to keep our relationship going and hv lots of laughs along the way..... collecting new comments and making them our private jokes to share wif our other interracial marriage friends. Our exchange of experiences of our vastly different backgrounds enriched our personal selves. Bcos of our different backgrounds, we never presume about anything wif each other, always bear in mind about respect for each other's differences, always speak up and maintain high level of communication. All of which happen to be important key points to a healthy relationship... :sport-smiley-003:

Ha that sounds like a really interesting experience, both interracial and "transnational". When it is like that, there are really a lot of things to learn about each other's culture!

Like myself too, I'm also in an interracial and transnational marriage. For some reasons, to many singaporeans, the concept of a "race" is too overpowering for them to understand that people of the same "race" (I prefer the term ethnic group) can have different cultures because they are from different parts of the world! And one'd think it'd be easy for singaporeans to understand when singapore is a nation of immigrants, but apparently the concept is lost on them. Even when I start becoming a tad bit impatient and sarcastic by saying my hubby is as much like someone from india (he's indian ethnicity) as you are similar to someone from china. The appearance may be similar but that's about where the similarities end.

It takes courage I guess. We go through racism everyday. People make the dumbest comments about someone who is of a different ethnic group (as is always, the majority usually holds the biggest prejudices). I get asked the same question by my mum (why can't you find a chinese guy). But she's alright with that now, so yeah, it's cool.

By the way, I love curly hair on a child :)

Cheers.

 

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Ha that sounds like a really interesting experience, both interracial and "transnational". When it is like that, there are really a lot of things to learn about each other's culture!

Like myself too, I'm also in an interracial and transnational marriage. For some reasons, to many singaporeans, the concept of a "race" is too overpowering for them to understand that people of the same "race" (I prefer the term ethnic group) can have different cultures because they are from different parts of the world! And one'd think it'd be easy for singaporeans to understand when singapore is a nation of immigrants, but apparently the concept is lost on them. Even when I start becoming a tad bit impatient and sarcastic by saying my hubby is as much like someone from india (he's indian ethnicity) as you are similar to someone from china. The appearance may be similar but that's about where the similarities end.

It takes courage I guess. We go through racism everyday. People make the dumbest comments about someone who is of a different ethnic group (as is always, the majority usually holds the biggest prejudices). I get asked the same question by my mum (why can't you find a chinese guy). But she's alright with that now, so yeah, it's cool.

By the way, I love curly hair on a child :)

Cheers.

COOL, another interracial and transnational marriage :D . I pretty sure u hv had received very similar remarks as us ;) . One thing we did notice is dat if your man is white, its more acceptable, guess white supremacy is still very much alive, a leftover from colonial times.

Well, in my case, it was my father who was worried about him cheating me, I was mean but I told my father that he is not a millionaires and no one is keen to cheat his daughter of her inheritance, cos theres none, also he should hv faith in his upbringing dat his daughter is not gullible... Anyway, my father is always seeking my hb's opinions on things now, finally believes in his daughter's choice.

Don't they look cuter wif curly hair..... Luckily for me, my boy's hair is only curly not kinky. When I was pregnant, i was worried that if its a girl, I wouldn't know how to comb out the hair, cos no experience even doing our straight asian hair. I hv got very short hair for as long as I can remember... :lol: Whats worst, my hb's nieces scream whenever their hair get combed, and thats by their very experienced mothers :jawdrop: .

:dancingqueen:

Edited by MLR
 

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