To Hav Wedding Dinner Or Not?

[summerholiday 2]

nowadays market is bad.. everyone are cash tight esp after purchasing a flat and renovating it.

i hav tis pro, i'm alread cash tight cum with loans to pay.. soon will wan to hav a kid too.. and the kids will need cash too

now, my mil is chasing for a weddin dinner but i would like to save up money for future n for kid..

how?

another thing is i wont feel good if when attending my dinner my friends don enjoy.. also we are alread staying together for a yr.. a dinner is sthg tat already not sthg to hope for

[Angel81 1]

What abt ur hb? How does he feel about this? If he don't wana have a dinner as well, then maybe ur can sit ur MIL down and explain to her.

Tink the older folks always like to have dinners, esp if the son is only son.. Wana "showcase" to everyone.

Hee.. u were talking abt kids. Maybe can tell her that ur wana save $ for future kids. If have dinner, will have to postpone kids plan, cuz no $$ liao. Old pple always wish for grandkids soonest. Maybe this will make her choose to forgo the dinner?

[xinyi_reiko 0]

nowadays market is bad.. everyone are cash tight esp after purchasing a flat and renovating it.

i hav tis pro, i'm alread cash tight cum with loans to pay.. soon will wan to hav a kid too.. and the kids will need cash too

now, my mil is chasing for a weddin dinner but i would like to save up money for future n for kid..

how?

another thing is i wont feel good if when attending my dinner my friends don enjoy.. also we are alread staying together for a yr.. a dinner is sthg tat already not sthg to hope for

hmm.. how abt telling your mil that have a small scale wedding dinner? just invite close relatives.. as for friends side.. can have a seperate celebration... i believe they will understand..

[Yang Guo 7]

Hi summerholiday,

hmmm..does your hubby need to give your family any number of tables? If yes, then its a lot of cost..

if dont need, my opinion is to hold the dinner lor. Anyway its really a good experience, cos your guest dress nicely and come to attend, and the whole dinner place is yours.

but the only thing is the bridal cost? need gowns also.

Some people wedding dinner make profit, some make loss. Maybe yours will make profit also?

I just had my wedding dinner. Its really worth having a banquet cos its once in a life thing

[summerholiday 2]

talkin abt weddin gown tat's another sum to go.. haiz.. how don wan to b a beautiful bride.. i also wish to forgo the weddin photo cos if wan to take i hope to hav a nice wan else i would felt that money is waste on..

if go jb, need travel, i rather spend the time doing some household chores to keep my house clean.. i think becos we bought a house with not much savings so now money spend on paying loans and instalments..

never had addition cash for wedding dinner nor photos..

next when i tell my friend abt it, they also feel tat i can might as well save e money cos alread stay together for 1 yr..

of cos my hubby wish to hav cos can ans to my mum.. haiz.. if i spend money on dinner, i need dunno how long to save for kids..

hav anyone est. the expenditure on gy? and on delivery fees? or jus day by day see how..

[xinyi_reiko 0]

talkin abt weddin gown tat's another sum to go.. haiz.. how don wan to b a beautiful bride.. i also wish to forgo the weddin photo cos if wan to take i hope to hav a nice wan else i would felt that money is waste on..

if go jb, need travel, i rather spend the time doing some household chores to keep my house clean.. i think becos we bought a house with not much savings so now money spend on paying loans and instalments..

never had addition cash for wedding dinner nor photos..

next when i tell my friend abt it, they also feel tat i can might as well save e money cos alread stay together for 1 yr..

of cos my hubby wish to hav cos can ans to my mum.. haiz.. if i spend money on dinner, i need dunno how long to save for kids..

hav anyone est. the expenditure on gy? and on delivery fees? or jus day by day see how..

hmm.. i feel around 5k-6k can settle wedding package plus actual day photography and videography. of coz is not high standard kind.. as for wedding package.. can forgo on pre-wedding photography if you want..

actually there are some small scale homebase bridal shop.. they offer lower range of gown rentals. not exactly gorgeous but still acceptable. for example, http://bridalcloset.multiply.com/

as for dinner.. there are still cheaper range.. around $600 nett per table.. but is restaurants. which i believe higher possibility for having breakeven. such restaurants usually throw in free beers and red wines.. so can save on that.

as of those small things like an chuang, guo da li.. if both side ok.. can just forgo..

Edited October 31, 2008 by xinyi_reiko

[summerholiday 2]

wow we don even hav 4k in total savings.. loan from parents still need repay.. like tat how to save for kids?

[Angel81 1]

Hi summerholiday,

My wedding package (gowns, AD photographer, wedding car, wedding pics) cost abt $4k. If u dun wana take pics, can always get them to customise your package. Minus the pics and throw in other perks, etc.

Wedding dinner was at Peony Jade (Clarke Quay). Nowadays many restaurants throw in hotel stay and many other perks as well, and on top of that, restaurants tend to have better food compared to hotels (whh was why we chose a restaurant instead of hotel). It's been 2 yrs since my wedding, and yet everytime I meet my relatives for other cousins' weddings, they kept telling me that my dinner's food was much better. Tink per table was abt $600. At the end of the wedding, I tink we broke even, including the wedding package cost.

Now during the economic downturn, I believe competition is much higher, and u may be able to get better rates or more perks thrown in to the package.

However, at the end of it, it's still up to you and your hb whether ur wana have a wedding dinner anot. I agree with Yang Guo that it's a once in a lifetime thingy. Till now I didn't regret having one (it was fun!). But if you don't wana have one and is forced to, then you may not feel happy but find it a hassle. Remember that there will be lots of planning before the actual day.

PS: soli, no idea abt gy & delivery. Not yet.

[Yang Guo 7]

everytime when i play the video of my wedding dinner brings out the sweet memory during that night. Especially the march-in moment

my banquet dinner break even also..so its not guarantee that its a extra cost to u.

I guess most importantly is the place of the dinner that you hold. Some places sure have to incur loss. Eg. if your per table is $1100 for 10pax. This type sure incur alot of expense cos most guest gives $80-$100 Angbao.

So if u can manage to find a v nice and good place that cost $700 per table and your guest can easily give u minimum $80 per pax, this senario will most likely break even

If you prefer 4-5star hotel that is nice and convenient, you try to find a table that cost between $900~$1000?

Edited October 31, 2008 by Yang Guo

[rdnest 0]

me vote 'NO DINNER'

If I could decide again, sure to forego the dinner.

Not worth it when compare the pros & cons. Yes, very memorable...

my HB got dead drunk, left me make payment. very memorable indeed

frankly, those photo package album & video & sort only been viewed for the initial months.

later all gone to storerm to take up space. Of couse, should hv a wedding portrait at least.

tt time me oso hv e dinner to make those old folks happy. But when need to pay time, all siamz

talk alot, but no sponsor. me so foolish lor. made me & hubby suffered n to put 'gold' on other ppl faces.

now think still feel so heartache... the $$$ spent could give us a very good honeymoon liao lor

now with kids, dun even dare to think... sigh... if only...

IMHO only hor... different ppl different situation.. u both couple discuss discuss...

[summerholiday 2]

rdnest, ya i agree that the wedding photos.. initial yrs and when u very old, tat's e time u look at it.. thereafter it jus stay there.. a proof of memories..

dinner, haiz.. no hotel, firends talk behind, got hotel, food not nice also talk behind.. there's once i attend a weddin dinner during the march-in, all guest supportedly clap for a min or lesser.. imagine bride and groom march in the rest without claps..

hotel, old folks say food no good, resturants, friends are find cheapo.. to spend time and effort to please your guess, end up not pleasing them, i also wun feel happy lo..

actually i only wish to apend money wisely, if hav extra cash, i sure don mind, but now no money.. no sponser..

housework never endin.. cant imagine how to find time for tat?

[SmartFool 0]

how abt a wedding lunch?

or just ROM and have a reception?

that 1 confirm save $

hehe

if need to showcase, lunch also can showcase i feel

[Fifi 0]

i tink now ppl wont tink restaurants no standard... most ppl are aware that food from restaurants are of much better standard than hotels.

i believe u can find a restaurant that cost less than $600. probably the ambience not so nice lah. but at least there's dinner rite? food do matter to some ppl

u can do away with the video on the actual day. prob just get a fren to help take pics so as to cut cost. and like what the others had suggested, invite those closer relatives or frens. avoid inviting all tom, dick and harry. i bet parents have this kind of mentality to invite ALL those they know. so this u might have to get some control.

prob find a restaurant which is just big enuff to hold the number of close frens and relatives. in this way, u can control the number of guests both sides parents invite!

[stevetang 0]

To have or not to have, sure discuss with ur HB better.

In forum can only get some feedback, after all this is between u & ur HB.

U can't please everyone rite??

But most important is both of u must be HAPPY abt it.

Why please other ppl, but make urself suffer.

[clover88 0]

Hi Summer holiday

Well, u really need to discuss this with your hubby.

For me, I don't have any wedding banquet cos one no budget...(we need abt 40 tables ba) second I dun like to do things too tiring and not to my liking. Alot of ppl say well weddding is once in a life time memory, u should do this do that....but I choose to go against it. I took wedding photos thou...but now is inside cupboard for 8 years le. This is just a suggestion la, it is u to you to choose. My MIL, mum and relative say alot of things... BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY i am not in debt and happy till now even w/o wedding banquet. But yes, I went for honeymoon after I registered at ROM....erm more relax lor, as lest is for myself.....

PS: HAPPY is the key word lor...as long as u n ur hubby is happy why worry?

Best Wishes

Clover