Before And After Marriage

[korea 0]

You all don't know. I used to walk away, or rather, I tried to walk away when he raised his voice at me in public. You know what he did? He tagged along and continue to raise his voice and kept announcing loudly the wrongs I've done him and how I shouldn't do this and that. I realised that if I don't shout at him back, he'll continue to do it. So nowadays, I just scream at him in public whenever he's about to raise his voice at me.

When I asked him why he doesn't allow me, or the both of us, to cool off, he said he doesn't believe in cooling off. He said everything must settle on the spot. I told him it's not possible to talk and think properly in the heat of the moment but he still maintained that everything must be talked out right there and then. Isn't that exasperating?

Why must I find a nicer man before I divorce him - Bcos if there isn't a nicer man, I think I might not be able to leave him at all. I've tried to live without men for some years. It's really not easy. After a while, it gets really lonely. Nobody to take you to the movies, nobody to buy food for you when you eat out, nobody to share your joy and sorrow with, nobody to go to KK hospital with you when your kid's temperature maintains at 40 degree celcius. It's really very distressing and ... lonely la.

ya, sometimes hubby also likes to raise his voice loudly in the public. why men like to do that? usually, i'll pretend to cry but this tactic doesn't seem to work after sometimes.

i've tried to live without men for the past 21 years. there're good and bad lor. good is nobody quarrel with you and more peaceful, not many problems too. bad is you feel lonely when you see another couples. nobody celebrate Vday with you and nobody share your joys.

whenever he raises his voice at u, give him a hug & a kiss. chances of patching up are usually high.

hug and kisses? not easy, manz. when he's , he'll not bother hug and kisses anymore.

[cornetto 0]

u guys should go for marriage counselling if this hostility continues...

[gothique 0]

hi gals

i think SG men got a tendency to be quite harsh with their words leh. Anyway what happened is that when hubby shout at me for xxx reason, i will totally stop doing that thing. then when he ask me why, i just say. cuz you always shout at me / scold me if i xxx.

e.g. whenever i eat ba kut teh, i dunno how to eat the meat until the bones are very clean... then he always scolds me that i never finish the food properly. then i would feel v hurt... cuz he scold me in public i am sure everyone can hear him. and i spoke to him saying that he should not do that.. but he always forget and keep scolding me.

after a while, he realised that everytime he suggest eat ba kut teh, i will say No, I dun want to eat. then he will ask me why... after a while he realise that the way he speaks to me really makes a difference.

[Phantom 1]

1. more drama - break down n cry VERY loudly (ppl usually preceive the guy is the one who bullied the gal)

This is something that a friend i know would do... evil...

but

effective.. lol..

[korea 0]

hi gals

i think SG men got a tendency to be quite harsh with their words leh. Anyway what happened is that when hubby shout at me for xxx reason, i will totally stop doing that thing. then when he ask me why, i just say. cuz you always shout at me / scold me if i xxx.

e.g. whenever i eat ba kut teh, i dunno how to eat the meat until the bones are very clean... then he always scolds me that i never finish the food properly. then i would feel v hurt... cuz he scold me in public i am sure everyone can hear him. and i spoke to him saying that he should not do that.. but he always forget and keep scolding me.

after a while, he realised that everytime he suggest eat ba kut teh, i will say No, I dun want to eat. then he will ask me why... after a while he realise that the way he speaks to me really makes a difference.

ya, SG men are harsh with their words. why? i saw "ang moh" men aren't like that leh. they often speak very softly to their gf/wives.

This is something that a friend i know would do... evil...

but

effective.. lol..

not effective after sometimes leh. he'll be numb liao or maybe even

[Phantom 1]

ya, SG men are harsh with their words. why? i saw "ang moh" men aren't like that leh. they often speak very softly to their gf/wives.

not effective after sometimes leh. he'll be numb liao or maybe even

Ang Moh men?

Please don't compare. I remember I had an ang moh couple argue right in front of me and honestly, it wasn't pleasant.. the F***ing husband blamed me for something.. but after all the explanation.. he kenna left right center from the wife.. and then they started going at it in front of me..

[gothique 0]

haha phantom u are a guy is it...

i tend to agree with korea leh. cuz i used to have ang moh bf and they are really better with words than SG men. it is true. i got frenz with ang moh hubbies... and i do notice that they tend to be more verbal in appreciation and words of love.

but i think SG men are more responsible towards their wives and work harder to provide for the family. and for myself i think that the way SG men express their love for their wives / kids. very practical, right?

Not meaning that dun have romantic SG men. Have! But tend to be less lor... i think not surprising, given our reserved asian culture.

so there are good and bad for both types of men! but ultimately i chose to marry Singaporean man. and i don't regret it! even though he take a harsh tone on me sometimes and he also shouts at me when he gets frustrated with me. i feel hurt but i know that he shows his love in other ways that i need to take time to OPEN my eyes big big and appreciate him.

[Phantom 1]

haha phantom u are a guy is it...

i tend to agree with korea leh. cuz i used to have ang moh bf and they are really better with words than SG men. it is true. i got frenz with ang moh hubbies... and i do notice that they tend to be more verbal in appreciation and words of love.

but i think SG men are more responsible towards their wives and work harder to provide for the family. and for myself i think that the way SG men express their love for their wives / kids. very practical, right?

Not meaning that dun have romantic SG men. Have! But tend to be less lor... i think not surprising, given our reserved asian culture.

so there are good and bad for both types of men! but ultimately i chose to marry Singaporean man. and i don't regret it! even though he take a harsh tone on me sometimes and he also shouts at me when he gets frustrated with me. i feel hurt but i know that he shows his love in other ways that i need to take time to OPEN my eyes big big and appreciate him.

Yes I am a guy. Chauvinism comes in the asian package. Can't take it away. Then again i'd rather not go into the details. I don't believe that Ang Moh are more sweet loving then SG men.. and end up this becomes a debate.

Bottom line is Men who beat women are wrong. fullstop. regardless of race/religion.

Men OR women who don't try to help the relationship also wrong.

I had a couple friend .. husband beat wife...

wife also admit she got her faults when she came and complain to me...

after 1year.. everything ok.. both happy...

if all fails, marriage counselling.

If that fails, women can go find themeselve a better man.

[korea 0]

haha phantom u are a guy is it...

i tend to agree with korea leh. cuz i used to have ang moh bf and they are really better with words than SG men. it is true. i got frenz with ang moh hubbies... and i do notice that they tend to be more verbal in appreciation and words of love.

but i think SG men are more responsible towards their wives and work harder to provide for the family. and for myself i think that the way SG men express their love for their wives / kids. very practical, right?

Not meaning that dun have romantic SG men. Have! But tend to be less lor... i think not surprising, given our reserved asian culture.

so there are good and bad for both types of men! but ultimately i chose to marry Singaporean man. and i don't regret it! even though he take a harsh tone on me sometimes and he also shouts at me when he gets frustrated with me. i feel hurt but i know that he shows his love in other ways that i need to take time to OPEN my eyes big big and appreciate him.

i agree with those in red. "ang moh" men dare to express their appreciation and love openly whereas SG men are 'paisey" to do it.

Yes I am a guy. Chauvinism comes in the asian package. Can't take it away. Then again i'd rather not go into the details. I don't believe that Ang Moh are more sweet loving then SG men.. and end up this becomes a debate.

Bottom line is Men who beat women are wrong. fullstop. regardless of race/religion.

Men OR women who don't try to help the relationship also wrong.

I had a couple friend .. husband beat wife...

wife also admit she got her faults when she came and complain to me...

after 1year.. everything ok.. both happy...

if all fails, marriage counselling.

If that fails, women can go find themeselve a better man.

correct! men should never lay a finger onto women!

[gothique 0]

if all fails, marriage counselling.

If that fails, women can go find themeselve a better man.

Hey Phantom...

er... can i also add... if that fails... man can also find a better woman... cuz sometimes its the gal who doesnt want to make the relationship work u know...

[Phantom 1]

Hey Phantom...

er... can i also add... if that fails... man can also find a better woman... cuz sometimes its the gal who doesnt want to make the relationship work u know...

lol...

Yes. sometimes its the gal.. Have heard of 1 case happening to a friend... then again, they weren't married yet, so it wasn't that bad.

[korea 0]

lol...

Yes. sometimes its the gal.. Have heard of 1 case happening to a friend... then again, they weren't married yet, so it wasn't that bad.

seem like your friends have many relationship problems.

[Phantom 1]

seem like your friends have many relationship problems.

lol.. i have many friends.

[ahnah 0]

hi all .. I choose to marry Indonesia woman as my wife instead.

Hahaha

[krisietong 0]

i agree with those in red. "ang moh" men dare to express their appreciation and love openly whereas SG men are 'paisey" to do it.

correct! men should never lay a finger onto women!

opps.. I am gulity of laying hand on my hubby instead