Do You Wish For Your Child(ren) To Support You?

[LinDa 0]

For me, nope as I only intend to have 1 or max max 2 kidas. Hence, I do not think they will be able to do so. However, I do appreciate nringing me out for dinners during important occasions like my birthday and Mother's days. Allowance is not necessary also. Will work harder, save and invest to grow a comfortable retirement nest egg.

That's what I hope to achieve la, but looking at the way I'm spending on my renovation, seems very hard. Haha~

Edited : Ai yo, trying to do poll, but not successful.

Edited May 15, 2007 by LinDa

[korea 0]

For me, nope as I only intend to have 1 or max max 2 kidas. Hence, I do not think they will be able to do so. However, I do appreciate nringing me out for dinners during important occasions like my birthday and Mother's days. Allowance is not necessary also. Will work harder, save and invest to grow a comfortable retirement nest egg.

That's what I hope to achieve la, but looking at the way I'm spending on my renovation, seems very hard. Haha~

Edited : Ai yo, trying to do poll, but not successful. !!

i help you to create a poll lah.

[HSH21 1]

I agreed with Linda... with the living standard increase so fast... I must thank god that if they can support themselve...

[X.H.LI 0]

wish of cos i will wish and hope and day dream....

and yah...

just wish hope and day dream nia.

don expect they will really 'feed' parents till last day.

[SmartFool 0]

no thanks

i dun want to depend on anybody and be my kids liability

[CutePinkElephant 0]

I agreed with Linda... with the living standard increase so fast... I must thank god that if they can support themselve...

agree with u.

they can support and live happily that very good already

what i do now is, buy an insurance for retire ,life and their uni study.

i really afraid of retire and really depend on insc dont know right or not

[stevetang 0]

agree with u.

they can support and live happily that very good already

what i do now is, buy an insurance for retire ,life and their uni study.

i really afraid of retire and really depend on insc dont know right or not

Agreed with u too, dare not expect them to feed me.

Just dun come disturb me, when i retired.

Must enjoy with my wife by the time they grow up.

[gumbokins 5]

i think if it's within their means, then sure, why not!

as long as i don't hv to keep supporting them, can liaoz!

but looking at my parents, my 30 yr old bro, still staying at home. my dad loaned me the $ for the house COV and reno, my sis still in uni. Parents 55+ liao, still supporting, how and when to retire?

[zirhk3355 1]

Let's think back; when a couple decides to have a baby, is it one of the top reasons to support them in old age?? I doubt it, so we should never have this thought at all.

However, its seemed to be in our culture to do so; our forefathers had taken care of their own children, then take care of their own parents and end up having no money to take care of themselves. So it goes with the children taking care of them and end up not having money to take care of themselves too. Its like taking two steps forward and one step backward.

IMO, in order to break this cycle, we must make sure we are can take care of OURSELVES, and not hoping that our children can earn more to take care of us. Whatever they earn is to be spend for the FUTURE, ie for themselves and for their offsprings, not backward for their parents.

but looking at my parents, my 30 yr old bro, still staying at home. my dad loaned me the $ for the house COV and reno, my sis still in uni. Parents 55+ liao, still supporting, how and when to retire?

Ermm! So you should know where the problem lies, don't you?

Maybe the angmohs are doing the right thing; they move out by the time they start to work, where their parents only in their late-30's or early-40's, and can start planning for old age.

[stevetang 0]

Let's think back; when a couple decides to have a baby, is it one of the top reasons to support them in old age?? I doubt it, so we should never have this thought at all.

However, its seemed to be in our culture to do so; our forefathers had taken care of their own children, then take care of their own parents and end up having no money to take care of themselves. So it goes with the children taking care of them and end up not having money to take care of themselves too. Its like taking two steps forward and one step backward.

IMO, in order to break this cycle, we must make sure we are can take care of OURSELVES, and not hoping that our children can earn more to take care of us. Whatever they earn is to be spend for the FUTURE, ie for themselves and for their offsprings, not backward for their parents.

Ermm! So you should know where the problem lies, don't you?

Maybe the angmohs are doing the right thing; they move out by the time they start to work, where their parents only in their late-30's or early-40's, and can start planning for old age.

Hum... than i must start teaching my kids the right things

Than when the times come, i can relax with my wife.

Lucky start saving abit for my own reno when dating, if not must take loan..

But gumbokins, you are lucky to have parent to support. Me dare not take from my parent even though my mum offer to loan me.

As i feel, if taken easy $$ how fast u will re-pay??

But from bank, you sure die die also must re-pay right?

And dun u find its a burden for ur parent, but its still up to individual again.

Hope i didn't offend u in anyway, forgive me if i'm blunt

[yokine9a 1]

Maybe the angmohs are doing the right thing; they move out by the time they start to work, where their parents only in their late-30's or early-40's, and can start planning for old age.

Initially, I was a bit shocked when my friend told me his Australian lecturer chased her children out of her house when they started working, she insisted to stay alone. After seeing a few cases around me, I started to understand why angmohs are doing that.

I have a female friend who would get married soon, have not got a flat yet (joining the queue with HDB), decided to stay with her parents. She claimed she has no $$ for resale flat, staying with parents would mean her parents could help to take care of her & her husband. Maybe when she has kids, her parents could also become baby sitter. Indirectly, I see her turning her parents into her maids.

[Devilaz 0]

For me i wont want to entask the burden to mine kids. Nowadays life is getting hard. That will make an increase burden and make them more pressure and stressful.

As what yokine9a stated yes. thats is their culture. They dont want their kids to stay with them when they are either started their own carrer or marriage life.

[gumbokins 5]

Let's think back; when a couple decides to have a baby, is it one of the top reasons to support them in old age?? I doubt it, so we should never have this thought at all.

However, its seemed to be in our culture to do so; our forefathers had taken care of their own children, then take care of their own parents and end up having no money to take care of themselves. So it goes with the children taking care of them and end up not having money to take care of themselves too. Its like taking two steps forward and one step backward.

IMO, in order to break this cycle, we must make sure we are can take care of OURSELVES, and not hoping that our children can earn more to take care of us. Whatever they earn is to be spend for the FUTURE, ie for themselves and for their offsprings, not backward for their parents.

Ermm! So you should know where the problem lies, don't you?

Maybe the angmohs are doing the right thing; they move out by the time they start to work, where their parents only in their late-30's or early-40's, and can start planning for old age.

well, my parents expected and insisted that we borrow money from them, coz they felt paying bank interest is ridiculous. so yes, i am thankful that my dad was so miserly with us growing up but for the record we also have a repayment plan hor..my dad gave us his invoice even.

as for my bro, well, not married, live at home good what. free everything. again, my parents are like "not married, what to do?" but we all contribute to household expenditures and when we were younger, we worked for extra pocket money during school breaks lah.

when i was in NZ, many of my uni classmates were already out on their own. over there, it was quite normal for them to be independent of their parents the moment they reached uni, usually at 17-18 years old. but that's because the govt gave them student allowance FOC and student loans to pay for their fees. imagine, most of them got about NZ$250 allowance per week to pay for living expenses. where got so good here?

just like how i wouldnt abandon my parents completely, just because they are financially stable, i do hope that my children will still be around to take care of me, even if not financially, because it's about family values and respect for elders.

[zirhk3355 1]

Huh, you mean your parents forced it down your throat to take their money? Or if you don't take they will disown you??

I know what you meant lah, not trying to change your belief. Of course when in difficulties, who else can you turn to except your loved ones and your parents? And if really got a lot of money of course will be first to share with is your loved ones too.

But what I am saying is our own mindset, it should always be to depend on ourselves first then turn to other means if really cannot make it. Also good for training ourselves; how long can our parents be around? We can't depend on them forever.

More importantly, sometimes we don't really know if our parents are really okay with their finances or just putting a nice front but struggling behind. To them, they can sacrifice themselves for their children. Money will never be enough one lor; there is no such thing as "extra money".

Tell you a real life eg: Once my dad give up his holiday dream (which I didn't know) in order to give me the money for the downpayment of my car. He was doing well, so I thought he got "extra money" and I took it. Now I felt so bad. Yes my dad won't die if don't go for holiday, but I also won't die to save up first and buy the car later mah, right? Now even though I repaid him, he also never go for that holiday anymore because no kakis to go with; his friends already went liao.

Thus its not so much in difficulties that I am talking about here, but its the little luxuries that our parents can enjoy if we are able to take care of ourselves and not depend on them anymore...

Oops, going off-topic here...hehe...

[gumbokins 5]

no, of course my parents were not shoving the money down my throat BUT the way they saw it, the house was a necessity and the renovations were basic.

ideally, yes, i would hv loved to pay for the house myself, but let's be realistic. newly married, 2 yrs into a govt job and a baby. help was extended for me, and i am forever greatful for it.

i won't knock them up for unnecc. purchases like holidays or upgrade TV etc, that would be unreasonable.