Why Do Man Keep Mistress Or Girlfriends After Marriage?

[Angelwrath 0]

maybe wife never upkeep her beaut?

Yup, Mrs. cantona is a chio bu~

dont know wat he thinking abt, later she check forum then u dieeeeeee

[Junkay 1]

Yup, Mrs. cantona is a chio bu~

dont know wat he thinking abt, later she check forum then u dieeeeeee

Its not about the looks lah i tell you. Look at Hugh Grant.. he had Elizabeth Hurley... LIZ HURLEY!!! but he still needed to have some form of exhibitionist fun, male dominance satisfication.

Most males like to feel that they are in control and has the final say over certain things. Its how most of us are brought up. Its hard to break a mould that we witness while growing up no matter what we say cos that is our reference. Its ground zero. So in order to get back that control or familiarity, men have mistresses. Some might say its a show of power, to be able to afford a mistress. Let it be known that I am not condoning these actions, but its a proven fact of mental assessment.

I have a lady friend who recently just seperated from her hubby, barely a year after giving birth to a son. She thought it might help their dying relationship but its not healed from outside. I see it as the husband doesnt feel that he has control and respect from her so he goes out and seek that comfort from other venues. She has many admirers, she goes out partying often and so he feels like has to also in order not to lose face. So in the end, its all about honest communication. But u have to want to communicate first lah.

[ranval9 0]

Its not about the looks lah i tell you. Look at Hugh Grant.. he had Elizabeth Hurley... LIZ HURLEY!!! but he still needed to have some form of exhibitionist fun, male dominance satisfication.

Most males like to feel that they are in control and has the final say over certain things. Its how most of us are brought up. Its hard to break a mould that we witness while growing up no matter what we say cos that is our reference. Its ground zero. So in order to get back that control or familiarity, men have mistresses. Some might say its a show of power, to be able to afford a mistress. Let it be known that I am not condoning these actions, but its a proven fact of mental assessment.

I have a lady friend who recently just seperated from her hubby, barely a year after giving birth to a son. She thought it might help their dying relationship but its not healed from outside. I see it as the husband doesnt feel that he has control and respect from her so he goes out and seek that comfort from other venues. She has many admirers, she goes out partying often and so he feels like has to also in order not to lose face. So in the end, its all about honest communication. But u have to want to communicate first lah.

if both still wan to party .. then by all means ... party .. dun get married in the 1st place ... , never get involve any child esp when you are not ready and dun have a stable relationship ... everyone will suffer ...

i still dun get it ... why do ppl always think that having a child would help any dying relationship .. to be better ...

once there is a no trust and no love towards each other .. how are the couple goin to take care and upbring the child ...

having a baby is to have a family bonded as a whole ... with love and care.

best when both are willingly parents and havin a good n stable relationship ...

poor baby .. totally lost child ...how to choose to be with mummy or to be with daddy when only just a toddler ..

when he or she grows up , mindset is to not to have any kid at all .. dun wan the next kid to suffer like wise.

[Air 0]

if both still wan to party .. then by all means ... party .. dun get married in the 1st place ... , never get involve any child esp when you are not ready and dun have a stable relationship ... everyone will suffer ...

i still dun get it ... why do ppl always think that having a child would help any dying relationship .. to be better ...

once there is a no trust and no love towards each other .. how are the couple goin to take care and upbring the child ...

having a baby is to have a family bonded as a whole ... with love and care.

best when both are willingly parents and havin a good n stable relationship ...

poor baby .. totally lost child ...how to choose to be with mummy or to be with daddy when only just a toddler ..

when he or she grows up , mindset is to not to have any kid at all .. dun wan the next kid to suffer like wise.

Agree!

I also can't understand how come some ppl use kids as an excuse to salvage the marriage.

Even if it can be salvaged, you can also only be there physically but mentally already not there. How to continue living together and face each other??

To me, it's a very selfish behaviour. Kids are always the ones who suffer.

Long term, shadows are cast over their concept of relationships.

[TPY 0]

Agree!

I also can't understand how come some ppl use kids as an excuse to salvage the marriage.

Even if it can be salvaged, you can also only be there physically but mentally already not there. How to continue living together and face each other??

To me, it's a very selfish behaviour. Kids are always the ones who suffer.

Long term, shadows are cast over their concept of relationships.

for the children

[Junkay 1]

This is beginning to sound like a MJ live aid prelude.

[Cantona7 0]

Agree!

I also can't understand how come some ppl use kids as an excuse to salvage the marriage.

Even if it can be salvaged, you can also only be there physically but mentally already not there. How to continue living together and face each other??

To me, it's a very selfish behaviour. Kids are always the ones who suffer.

Long term, shadows are cast over their concept of relationships.

I Agreed too. Kids should not be use as a tool to salvage the marriage but woman always like to use it as a weapon against their HB. They would sometime ask their kids called their father to spot check where is he or threaten not to let their children see him or worst bad mouth him if he ask for divorce.

Without knowing the parent indirectly drag the kids into their soar marriage, actually even parent divorce they can also be a good father or mother to their child, the child shld knw is just that the parent cannt live together but doesnt mean they dont love them anymore.

i strongly feel that cantona is becoming a buaya ...

btw congrats for your happiness :wub:

not sure abt others' wifey ..

only know Mrs Cantona is a chio bu .. and always dolls up herself..

Cantona is a lucky man !!

or else where

I am not a BUAYA

[Air 0]

I Agreed too. Kids should not be use as a tool to salvage the marriage but woman always like to use it as a weapon against their HB. They would sometime ask their kids called their father to spot check where is he or threaten not to let their children see him or worst bad mouth him if he ask for divorce.

Without knowing the parent indirectly drag the kids into their soar marriage, actually even parent divorce they can also be a good father or mother to their child, the child shld knw is just that the parent cannt live together but doesnt mean they dont love them anymore.

I won't exactly say that women are using kids as a "weapon" against their husbands lah.

Women mostly feel very helpless when hubby strays. Put yourself in their shoes, if you are the woman, what would you do if you find out your hubby strayed?? What can you do??

Rather than confronting them directly which they know would eventually lead to explosion between the 2 parties, they'd rather use kids as a "softer" approach.

However, I am strongly against using kids as an way to threaten the hubby or bad mouthing the other party in front of kids. As I said, kids are the innocent parties. They didn't choose to come to this world and if you bring them to this world, either intentionally or unintentionally, then please show them the right path in life.

I've seen alot of sour cases on my side. I feel so sad for the children. I'm sure if they're able to choose, they won't choose to be born in such families. Be fair to them. Don't let them grow up bearing hatred in their hearts.

[ranval9 0]

I Agreed too. Kids should not be use as a tool to salvage the marriage but woman always like to use it as a weapon against their HB. They would sometime ask their kids called their father to spot check where is he or threaten not to let their children see him or worst bad mouth him if he ask for divorce.

Without knowing the parent indirectly drag the kids into their soar marriage, actually even parent divorce they can also be a good father or mother to their child, the child shld knw is just that the parent cannt live together but doesnt mean they dont love them anymore.

I personally know friends who suffered lots wor .. TRUSTING someone else is very hard for them ...

I am not a BUAYA

[Cantona7 0]

Yup, Mrs. cantona is a chio bu~

dont know wat he thinking abt, later she check forum then u dieeeeeee

Thank you she will be veri happy if she come to know she is Chio Bu. but I doubt she will

Edited May 8, 2008 by Cantona7

[Air 0]

Thank you she will be veri happy if she come to know she is Chio Bu.

I think in order for her to know, she has to come in and read leh...or else how she know??

[Phantom 1]

its very interesting reading this thread..

I'm in the opinion that there are 2 camps already developed here..

1 camp that thinks that old boy cantona is in some place he shouldn't be threading..

1 camp that is just discussing on topic for what it is.

Personally the thread should be rephrased. its rather sexist to say that man can indulge in infidelity after marriage and women can't.

With that I believe there would be more to discuss and share..

its very interesting reading this thread..

I'm in the opinion that there are 2 camps already developed here..

1 camp that thinks that old boy cantona is in some place he shouldn't be threading..

1 camp that is just discussing on topic for what it is.

Personally the thread should be rephrased. its rather sexist to say that man can indulge in infidelity after marriage and women can't.

With that I believe there would be more to discuss and share..

[Fifi 0]

I am not a BUAYA

oh ya... u're not buaya...

u're only ABC...

A = alligator

B = buaya

C = crocodile

[Cantona7 0]

oh ya... u're not buaya...

u're only ABC...

A = alligator

B = buaya

C = crocodile

How come u know me so well?

[Cantona7 0]

Dont worry!! We wont show this to Mrs Cantona 7.

Nowadays, men and women are equal, right?

We will just tell Mrs Cantona 7 to continue to have boyfriends (and girlfriends if she also prefers) --

Life is NEVER fair, so play hard if u can afford.

My personal view when a man stain, they alway expect their wifey to forgive them and promise not to do it again. But if they found out their wife having an affair too she will NEVER be forgiven. Worst maybe beaten up there are so many cases in Spore nt reported incld my friend (Dont even mention in India) .

Woman have more tolerate level than man or maybe is the love that forgive their HD mistake. However due to man's high pride esp infront of their buddy they will felt so shameful and mostly there are no turning point. (These does nt apply to all man or woman )